Well that was an eventful four years! just got my grade for my university degree. I guess you could call me Charlie Lodge BA Hons or something now not that people call other people that much i guess. it is much a relief to have finished.(though still have another day or so of degree show preparation to go) it has been one hell of a journey. There has been so many things that have happened through out the years, good and bad alike. Moved out to the city, embarked on a four year art course, met some amazing characters and friends, learned a lot about the world from a small place. For all of it i have grown up from this 18 year old shy-ish girl, new to the world to the 21 year old rounded adult i am today. it seems so weird to think that its been 4 years, it seems like no time at all. i looks back to my old self and greet her kindly as if to tell her things will be ok. i'm not sure if i expected to be where i am now but i am glad for it. i haven't posted much as of late, life seems to happen or i have more important things to do but i'm sat here now. All my anguish and hard work paid off, even though it may or may not have gone right in places. I should show it to you now :)
looking forward to new freedom, even if its just mental freedom from uni projects (uni is one big life project i guess, lots of concepts, developments, success and failures with a finished product). if there is one thing i have gained from my experiences that is helpful for the road ahead i would say that it is important to not be afraid to go out and try new experiences explore new opportunities, also to keep your chin up where ever you go, you never know when you are going to bump into someone who is having a worse time than you, even if that means running away for a little bit to go find some peace (in my case it took the form of family or in particular something furry), always be thoughtful, try to keep things interesting by varying the things in your life. i've found that all the hobbies i do have in some aspects helped improve my understanding or ability in another activity, be it from belly dancing to poi swinging to making clothing. i find it interesting to see how when doing one thing it will spark off ideas and musing about other things ultimately leading to some sort of revelation about something else entirely. its these moments i cherish and try to understand. amongst all the things that have happened over the past years i have developed a keen interest in various psychologies, i guess having things happen that aren't so alright but you still need to not let it affect you does this. i am really interested in what makes people tick, why they act that way, how they feel and how to act accordingly in different situations with those people. So far i've found it rewarding to go out of my comfort zone with people to make things work to go in and leave with the least collateral damage so to speak. as someone who deals with creating objects in the physical dimension (ok mostly digital it seems at the moment but that should change soon as i get back into more traditional personal projects) i find it slightly surreal that there is another dimension completely unseen, billions upon billions of secret, personal spaces, all different, changing form one thought to the next at any given moment. i find it a wonderful thing to see products of what lies beneath from what people make, give, take and do. Its a comfort. sometimes my head seems a lonely place. and then i look around me and see what others have created. i am connected to everyone by the products of so many different minds and people from so many places near and far. Then i also look around to my friends and family and the experiences i have gained and reminded i am not alone and i am grateful for the people who surround me. i once heard some one saying home is something you carry with you. i can attest to this, that is another thing that university life( not sure about the university itself, just the life experience bubble that almost makes university seem like a coincidental thing) has given me, the ability to think my way round things and carry with me what is familiar, my mind. this way of thinking has helped in my ability to go and do things with confidence or at least some sort of drive.
i have realised i have just spent a long time writing this rant with so much more to say but i better get back to posting pictures of the pretty things i have been doing for this semester if i want some sleep.
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